Guiding Strong-Willed Children

A few years ago, I wrote and published a devotional. In this devotional, I shared memories from my childhood and other musings that reminded me of scripture passages I had read. At Collins Family Ministries we currently have a preschooler who reminds me so much of myself when I was her age.

The following is an excerpt from my devotional Out of Darkness and Into Light and my message to all the strong-willed children and their parents who struggle:

“And the Lord said to Moses, ‘I have seen this people, and behold, it is a stiff-necked people.’”

Growing Up Strong-Willed

Growing up, I was known for being stubborn. However, in today’s terms I would have been referred to as strong-willed. As I would defiantly approach a boundary my mother had set, my sister would plead for me to change my behavior. Unfortunately, her words often fell on deaf ears.

Her words still ring clear in my ears today, ‘Kelly, can’t you see you are about to get a spanking?!’ It’s amazing how clear a situation can seem when we aren’t busy trying to meet our own needs. My sister did everything she could to get my attention, and she tried to point me in the right direction, but my gaze was set on having my own way.

When our gaze is set, we become stiff and limit our perspective. This attitude, unharnessed by the Holy Spirit, will take us down the road of consequence and rebellion.

Parenting with Love and Faith

Today, I know there are people out there who are struggling to parent a strong-willed child. I also know if the actions of a strong-willed child are harnessed by the love of a parent and the power of the Holy Spirit, anything is possible. A loving parent can change the world through the child God, by His grace, placed in their lives.

At Collins Family Ministries, we are teaching parents, children, and those we serve the truth about authority, obedience, and consequence. Through her actions, my mom built a relationship of trust with me over time. She set a standard for me and held me accountable when I fell short of the standard.

From Challenge to Strength

Strong-willed children are a challenge, but a quote I heard today by Ryan Leak reminded me of my mom because she did work to “match my energy, she worked to set the standard.” When we set the standard in advance, and enforce the standard with action, families are made stronger and strong-willed children become thriving adults.

For more information about the work we do at Collins Family Ministries, visit our website: collinsfamilyministries.org